Side Effects of starting over in a new country

Six months ago, during autumn, I landed off in New Jersey, United States, for a mandatory break. I needed a breather after a politic campaign I was participating in, where I worked hard every day. At that moment, I imagined that I had a short time there, like a month or so. I got prepared for a short trip just for chilling out, partying, posting some pictures on Instagram, and going to places I dreamed of visiting, like a guy hungry for traveling and knowing new places. Ready to explore new adventures and why not, finally finding love.

I discovered this was a new opportunity to meet new people and cultures. That’s why I preferred New York City, the capital of the world, as the site for beginning my trip. And allow life to live a unique experience, through a particular and sometimes controversial method: Dating Apps.

Was through Dating Apps that I found by far the most beautiful person in the world: funny, cute, reliable, and everything a man who believes in love can visualize. She was a woman like I never met before, and believe, when you find someone like this, you cannot let her go. 

At the moment when you find love as a treasure in a foreign country, you have to make a quick and smart decision. What could I do? Should I go back to my country? And, in effect, discard love chances in life, Or do I have to go straight forward in this new land and try to start over, trusting in her feelings, taking the risk as a professional in the United States?

In my case, I made a decision. Love as a new beginning for me. That was what matters, Indeed.

When you decide like this, you consider every single factor, aspect and try to measure your steps carefully. I mean, no decision must be made lightly. In my case, when I made up my mind to love, I didn’t know about the side effects of starting over.

The Anxiety of letting go what you were: 

Considering that I was working in my country, in a well-paid and almost dreamed job, with family and friends near me, I had to abandon my comfort zone to stay with a person I just met, and love; it was a little Anxy. Sometimes I could find myself struggling y own fears.

This Anxiety can grow even more when you see the skills you own as a professional are different in a country like the United States, where the requirement level is higher. True story! All your credit, reviews, and recognition are over. All these people that were your customers are far enough not to hire you, and these new people you are meeting are just making you feel like a rare breed. That’s something you have to accept and renounce. Anxiety comes, most of the times, due to the difficulty of communicating your ideas to a different culture. That’s what I call a cultural shock!

Reading a book, write, and watching native English movies to improve your fluency and be a better version of yourself. In my case, writing this blog has an essential role in my daily growth.

But you can also try activities like treating new people too. Nowadays, meeting people is the best way to reach confidence and a new networking structure.

Say thank you to all the opportunities life gives.

Another form to fight back Anxiety is being thankful. Sometimes, I could be acting like a victim for not giving value to this new route, and all the advantages could represent my growth. Also, being thankful to these friends or family is always holding your back applying the Murphy Law: everything could be worse. So take out this victim’s mask you have and stand up.

Another important aspect is when you keep comparing yourself with others and never thinking you are going to grow overnight. Stopping social networks, in my case, where my job was depending totally on this, was a brilliant decision. When you decide to stay in a foreign country, and social networks informed, it could be demanding to show the results of what you do, affecting your emotional health.

On the other hand, you have to think that, if you are expecting a legal status, you must not work, and you are going to be supported by your couple. Therefore you are going to have more free time for thinking about you as a professional, so build opportunities to improve your portfolio, skills, or knowledge, and that’s going to be a key for success afterward.

Confusion because you don’t know how to perform in your scenario:

What can I do after starting over in another country? Pretending that the same strategies are going to work for gaining new gigs is a colossal error.

After getting your work permit, behave, be a good worker, and scale. 

Clarify your thoughts

Instead of that, Improve your language and cultural skills. Be worried about learning the customs of the place you are and always be positive. Go out with new friends once in a while, and remember, after a long period of interacting with people of different cultures, you are going to become an expert sorting those issues out. Know the city you are living in, their needs, and try to undertake. There are apps such as Thumbtack, Fiverr, and Indeed. You can find a job or a gig to start. They worth it.

Give time to time

Nothing lasts forever. A simple but powerful phrase that makes you think that you have to be flexible. The confusion comes when you have no clear idea about how to be flexible in a new country, and you are just pretending to obtain the same results you obtained somewhere else, doing the same. Why not try to be different in a situation where are more advantages than disadvantages? And try different things to obtain different results. After trial and error, you’ll control this situation. 


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